On the corner of South Weller and East Cherokee, just a couple blocks east of Mercy Hospital, is Southside Church of Christ.
In May of 1982, my family moved to Springfield from Grand Junction, Colorado, and lived in a rental house on Weller Avenue, directly across from the church. In May of 1982, I was a bald, baseball-obsessed 7-year-old who didn’t know anyone in Springfield. I had dreams of playing baseball for the Kansas City Royals and the red brick walls of Southside Church of Christ seemed like a perfect training partner to help me develop my skills.
The parking lot of Southside Church of Christ is on the north side of the property, and the north-facing wall of the church building is predominantly red brick, with a row of small, rectangular windows approximately 3 feet below the roof line.
It only took me two throws to put a ball through a window.
I did not throw the ball through the window on purpose.
It was simply a bad throw.
Confession in the spirit of Lent
On the Christian calendar, the 40 days between Fat Tuesday and Good Friday (excluding Sundays) are known as Lent. Lent is supposed to be a period of prayer, fasting, thoughtfulness and introspection. The goal of Lent is to prepare followers of Jesus Christ to remember Jesus’ journey to the cross in anticipation of the miraculous Good News of Easter.
In the spirit of Lent, I have a confession to make:
I still make bad throws.
Some bad throws are born in curiosity. What happens if I hold the ball differently? What happens if I try and mimic someone else’s throwing motion? What happens if I run and jump and spin and throw?
Curiosity is necessary for lifelong learning. As Albert Einstein once said, “I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious.”
Play encourages curiosity, and some bad throws help us learn more about ourselves and our abilities.
Some bad throws are the results of the conditions — the weather, landing on a backyard mole hill with my plant foot, the first twinges of arthritis in one of my knuckles.
‘Embarrassing, humiliating and frustrating'
Regardless of the activity, there will always be factors beyond your control. That’s called life. Irish novelist and playwright Oliver Goldsmith wrote, “Success consists of getting up just one more time than you fall.”
Playing teaches us to persevere through all kinds of circumstances, and some bad throws are a chance to develop grit and mental strength.
For some bad throws, however, there are simply no reasonable explanations.
Why did that ball go 3 feet over his head? I have no idea.
I’ve witnessed people playing catch who, when bad throws are made, verbally roast their catch partners. I could feel the embarrassment secondhand.
I’ve seen fathers literally scream at their children, making them run and pick up the ball as a punishment for the bad throw. I can’t imagine that child wanting to play catch ever again.
Bad throws can be embarrassing, humiliating, and frustrating.
Play catch, work on your humanity
Keeping mistakes in proper perspective, which is what the season of Lent is supposed to do, bad throws are simply a tangible reminder of our humanity.
Bad throws are an excellent opportunity to work on your human skills. If you are the thrower, bad throws are an opportunity to laugh at yourself and learn. Say, “I’m sorry,” if you feel the need to, but keep playing.
If you are the receiver, bad throws are an opportunity to extend grace and empathy. Say, “It happens to me, too,” if you want to, and keep playing.
I think some people are hesitant to play catch with me because they fear making bad throws. I think they are afraid I will judge them as a result of a ball that bounces in the dirt or sails over my head.
I have one rule when playing catch: No judgment. Period.
I lost all my hair when I was six years old. I remember well the silent stares, the pointing fingers, and the whispers behind my back. I remember well the acts of judgment because I was physically different. And that was for something that was completely out of my control.
In our social-media driven culture, humanity has taken judgment to its extreme.
Choose to play even when it's scary
Playing catch is an invitation to stop judging yourself and others.
Be passionately curious. Brave the conditions. Trust yourself enough to step into the arena and play.
The miracle of playing catch makes new friends through shared stories. I can only hope that others experience the wonder and joy that comes through choosing to play as we get older.
Back to 7-year old me and the broken window... At Dad’s wise prompting, I wrote an apology letter to the pastor at Southside Church of Christ. The pastor didn’t berate me, humiliate me or embarrass me. Instead, he returned the baseball with a sympathetic smile.
I never threw a ball at that red brick wall again.
To this day, I’m searching all over Springfield for a windowless wall I can throw a ball against and keep developing my skills.
I am also searching for more Springfieldians willing to play catch with me. If you are interested in playing catch, send me an email: wannaplaycatch@gmail.com.
Along with a team of researchers at Missouri State University, I'm looking for looking for 40 people who are willing to play catch, once a day for 15 minutes, for two months straight. If you are interested in participating in this study — how fantastic is it that we get to “study” playing catch! — send an email to: wannaplaycatch@gmail.com.
